Becoming Someone Who Empathizes with Others
Bullied for being different, Poh Qing Xiang felt inadequate and struggled for years to recognize her own worth. Through Buddhist practice, family support and persistent inner effort, she developed the confidence to speak up, pursue her passion for art and encourage others through her own example.
My entrance into the world was a dramatic one, fraught with complications. My mother faced difficulties conceiving me, and after she became pregnant, she was told there was a risk of stillbirth because of my severe heart and lung abnormalities.
My parents earnestly chanted Nam-myoho-renge-kyo throughout all of these difficulties and eventually welcomed me into the world as a healthy child—the hole that had been detected in my heart had completely healed.
My Battle with Feelings of Inadequacy
Though otherwise healthy, I was born with only one ear. Life was an endless stream of troubles, a constant battle with my low self-confidence. Primary school was especially difficult for me. I struggled to connect with my classmates, who would tease me by covering one of their ears. I eventually stopped talking, often sitting in a corner of the classroom to draw by myself. My world was devoid of color, but at that young age, I did not know how to tell my parents what I was going through.
I eventually stopped talking, often sitting in a corner of the classroom to draw by myself . . . I did not know how to tell my parents what I was going through.
My low self-esteem made me quiet and reserved despite my teachers’ efforts to engage me. It was only after my teacher asked my parents to come to the school that they learned of the challenges I was facing. This became a turning point as my mother started to spend more time with me in a bid to understand my inner struggles. She chanted for me to overcome my feelings of inadequacy, but it was not easy for me to open up to anyone.
Standing Up for Myself
As I grew up, I developed a genuine interest in baking and secured an internship at a pastry shop. I found the noisy, chaotic kitchen overwhelming and struggled to hear the head chef’s instructions. This led to an endless barrage of misunderstandings and admonishments that caused me a great deal of anxiety, and I began taking medical leave more frequently. My parents encouraged me to disclose my hearing issue to the head chef and seek her understanding.
This incident taught me the importance of dialogue in fostering mutual understanding.
I took their advice and informed her but was instead met with harsh criticism for not being honest from the start and told that I would not have been hired had they known about my condition. These words cut me deeply; I felt embarrassed and was even more afraid to go back to work.
Seeing how hopeless I felt, my parents encouraged me to chant about the situation. I did so wholeheartedly and found the courage to return to work the next day. To my surprise, the head chef apologized for her harsh words, and we had a good dialogue. From then on, she often took the trouble to come over to me to give me instructions.
This incident taught me the importance of dialogue in fostering mutual understanding. As President Daisaku Ikeda says, “It’s important to have the courage to clearly say what needs to be said when it matters most.”
My parents supported me by chanting with me every day. Gradually, I became more confident in expressing my thoughts and feelings to others. Although it may seem like a small change, this was the start of my human revolution, the process of working to transform my core tendencies.
Art—My Way of Creating Joy and Hope
The COVID-19 pandemic put my cafe and pastry journey on hold, but I saw it as the perfect opportunity to become a full-time illustrator.
While the people around me voiced their doubts, my parents unwaveringly believed in me. I also made many good friends who encouraged me to pursue my passion and introduced me to the local community of artists. That was how I started my first pop-up art booth.
Art has always been a way for me to express my feelings. When I was younger, drawing helped me cope with loneliness. Now, art is my communication tool, through which I bring joy and hope to others.
In 2024, I participated in a Soka Gakkai youth training course in Japan. In the months leading up to the trip, I faced many inner battles each day. I chanted that my imperfections would not define me and that I would be able to encourage everyone I met with the joy I myself felt.
During the course, I shared my experience of how Buddhist practice had helped me gain the confidence to become an illustrator at a meeting of about 300 people. At the end of the session, a couple approached me. The husband told me that his wife, an artist, had been struggling to pursue her dream, but after hearing my experience, she felt she had found fresh courage to start her own journey as an illustrator.
I was deeply encouraged by their words. Although I had gone to Japan with the simple desire to encourage others, I came back feeling encouraged myself. As Nichiren writes, “If one lights a fire for others, one will brighten one’s own way” (WND-2, p. 1060).1
A truly respect-worthy person is not defined by their intellectual capabilities or social status, but by how deeply they treasure the person in front of them; I learned this from President Ikeda.
In My Own Unique Way
I realize how much I have grown as a person since I began practicing Buddhism. The nervous child who used to hide and draw in a corner, plagued by an inferiority complex, is now an artist who can encourage and support others. Everything I have gone through has enabled me to become someone who empathizes deeply with those who struggle with similar feelings.
I am determined to add color to the world in my own unique way. I will work harder and grow in every aspect of my life, so I can contribute to the creation of a world where actions are guided by compassion and respect for the dignity of life.
Adapted from the September 2025 issue of Creative Life, Soka Gakkai Singapore.
